From one "Friends" drama to another

Sometimes, you never know who really are your friends until a 小人 comes and shakes things up.

Say you met this 小人 through whom you thought was your Friend A, but he gives you a bad first impression. Then you think, 'Maybe I was too quick to judge.' So you meet for a second time and this time your gut feelings are confirmed. The 小人 turns out to be a self-centred, freeloading kinda guy and you don't exactly part on friendly terms.

Fast-forward 2 weeks and so-called Friend A appears to be ignoring your email. So you ask mutual Friend B to ask so-called Friend A about an event he is organising, to which he had previously proclaimed, 'You are always welcome to join.'

Friend B later reports that so-called Friend A says you don't get along with his friends, indirectly meaning that he doesn't want to invite you to his event. Of course, the 小人 isn't mentioned by name, but you know what has happened, since you have only ever met 2 of his friends. Admittedly, you don't like both of them but you don't go around bad-mouthing them to mutual friends.

Still, pulling the 恶人先告状 move isn't beneath a 小人-type of person.

Now, your friend isn't the guy who takes the 小人's words and doesn't even bother to ask you what had happened.

He also isn't the one who doesn't have the balls to tell you directly that he doesn't want to invite you to his event, but instead tells it in an indirect way to a mutual friend, counting on someone else to pass the message along.

He's also not the one who tells your mutual friends that you don't get along with his friends. This is really distasteful since it implies to others that you're a horrible person that all of his friends don't like, even though the truth is most of them don't even know you.

And he's definitely not the guy who pulls the primary school era my-friend-doesn't-like-you-so-I-also-don't-like-you shit.

So you see, 小人s play a really important role in exposing friendships, or lackthereof. Embrace them.

NB. It appears that another 小人, not coincidentally from the previous Friends drama, was in the mix. She has become so-called Friend A's friend, ironically, through my introduction. I suppose it was this initial move that ultimately led to the shit hitting the fan. Oopps.

Infection

I had trouble sleeping last night. I was thinking about the following rant I was going to post. It was actually supposed to be much longer, and what I envisioned to be more scathing, but I can no longer be bothered.

There was a primary school boy I'd never seen before at the climbing gym last night.

When I entered the reception area for payment, he took one look at me and announced in a raised voice, 'No people who are from China are allowed at the gym.'

There was a moment of awkward silence before the receptionist says with an embarrassed laugh, 'Ignore him, he is talking nonsense.'

Hearing that, the boy turns to her and queries, 'Does she speak Chinese? That means she is from China. I don't speak Chinese, I'm not from China.'

The people who have been in the position to influence this impressionable young mind have done a lovely job. Well done.

I've been cast as an extra in a "Friends" drama

The last few months, I have been busy hanging out with a bunch of new people who climb. (Lame excuse for the lack of new ramblings here, I know.)

They are a bit of a motley crew.

The second time we met, one of the guys appeared to be asking me out even though he had a (long-distance) girlfriend. That got him a telling-off.

Another guy, married with kids, told me he has "girlfriends" without his wife's knowledge. I am not sure why we were even having such a conversation. Someone suggested that the information was revealed as a way of hitting on me. If that was so, it totally failed.

Then there's the girl who was my initial point of contact with the group.

When we first met, she talked constantly about her ex. They were apparently set to be married last year, but it didn't happen 'cause the guy dumped her. We got on like a house on fire as she doesn't work and I work odd hours, and so had tons of time to spend online.

These days, it gets harder to say anything without stepping on some kind of landmine. She hardly mentions the ex anymore, but instead complains constantly about another girl in the group. Frenemies, they seem to be. Not that they would ever admit it. If you unwisely point out any similarities between them, well, good luck. You'll also need it if you catch her in a bad mood, where she'll lash out at you and later call it a "misunderstanding".

So, despite the deplorable moral standard of the guys, I now prefer hanging out with them than be poisoned by the toxic girls.

On another note - apparently, the year of the snake is going to be bad for me. Maybe I am going to meet a mongoose!

Hazard

Him: I will pay you on the day itself. I will pay even if I back out at the last minute. You don't trust me, right?
Me: After the last time, when I had to ask people for extra money, I don't trust anyone. It's not easy being the organiser, you know?

Her: Where can I buy a cup a coffee?
Me: Er, you can buy canned coffee at the convenience store after immigration.
Her: Where can we stop for freshly brewed coffee?

Her: How long does it take to get to the top?
Me: About 2 to 3 hours.
(About an hour later)
Her: How long more to go?
Me: I don't know.
(About 30 minutes later)
Her: How long more to go?

(About 2 days to the trek)
Him: I'm not going. I have to go to work.
Me: Huh?! Why didn't you say so earlier?
Him: It's because I decided to take leave at the end of this month, so I need to clear my work before I can go on leave. So I need to work on that day.
Me: Huh?! You knew this would piss me off.
Him: I will still pay you.
Me: I don't want your money.

The hazards of being the Organiser. More to come, I'm sure.

I have the flu

I was talking to a friend one day on the phone.

Friend: Oh, I'm at home today!
Me: No work? Why?
F: 'Cause H is sick.
M: What? Flu?
F: Yah, says going across the road to NTUC is like 10 kilometres. Got to cook for him.
M: ...... I don't think I am suited to married life, sorry.
F: You're just saying that, but if you got married you'd do the same.
M: No, I do not think so. Even if I was married, I wouldn't take a day's leave to stay at home to look after someone with the flu.
F: You sound like Sumiko Tan.

Ms Tan aside, this is the first time I have actually encountered the urban myth. That's the one where men, when they have a cold, are reduced to invalids, so much so that they think they are dying. The affliction is pejoratively termed "man flu". There's even a website devoted to offering help and advice to the "poor victims".

When I am sick, I go to the doctor. This happens more often now that I am accorded 14 sick days each year and given no incentive even if I do not activate any of them.

When the flu strikes, a medical certificate is key in avoiding the ridiculous air-conditioning. And if you live alone, medication is key in preventing a little cold from developing into full blown pneumonia, especially in the ridiculous winter.

So how do men who live alone cope, if they are reluctant to visit the doctor and have no one who'll coddle them? Let's call Mother?

Fortunately, researchers have come to their defence. Blame it on ... evolution?

Man flu is no myth as scientists prove men suffer more from disease

Man flu is not a myth, claim scientists, who found men suffer more because they invest in their spirit of adventure at the expense of their immune system.

Well, I've got 3 days of "family care leave". After that, you're on your own.

In the cab, episode 8: You know when

First, it was in a cab driven by an elderly man with snow white hair.

As we neared our destination, I tried to give him directions. 'Turn right ahead,' I said. He made a small noise, but I couldn't make out what it is. No matter as long as he turned right.

A minute later - 'It's the next block, in front of the stairs.'

This time, the response was swift and louder. 'I know, I know!' he grumbled. Hm, looks like I've been in his cab before, this white-haired old man with the squeaky voice.

A few days later -

it was a younger bespectacled man this time. Don't think I've been in his cab before, but - 'Have you been driven by a lady cab driver before?' is the first thing he asks.

'Erm ...'

'The lady driver behind us, she told me that she has driven you twice before.'

'Erm ... lady driver ... I guess so, once?' It's not hard to remember a night time lady driver, they are a rare breed.

'It's that cab behind us,' he rattles off the plate number. 'She told me.'

It takes years of taxi-taking from the same place and time before the drivers start discussing you and know exactly where you live. Time for a change?

The Ponyo Episode

Earlier this week, I'd realised with surprise that I can actually catch an evening movie the following day.

I decided to seek out a friend who seemed to have as irregular a work schedule as myself, and interest her in animation great Miyazaki Hayao's newest offering, Ponyo on the Cliff by the Sea.

The time and venue were quickly decided, but almost as an afterthought, she said she's quite sure she could make it, but might end up working late, and insisted that I call her before our agreed meeting.

This, despite being well-aware that I have no easy access to a telephone.

So I said, Sure, if I can find a public telephone.

I decided I would catch the agreed 8.30pm screening no matter how that turned out.

At 8.15pm, I found a public telephone on my way to the cinema.

She was still at work, had been waiting for my call, but could get to the cinema in 15 minutes.

Now I felt guilty about calling late, because 'waiting for your call' left the impression of being ready to leave at a moment's notice for ages (or since the wait started). But ...

I still have to one thing to do at work and I don't know how long it will take.

Isn't it a bit late for that? I queried.

And we don't know if there're still tickets, and I can't call you.

Even so, isn't it a bit late for that? I repeated.

So you're still going to catch it?

Why lie?

She ended the call with a brusque 'bye'.

Ah well. I have done all that I can.

NB. Ponyo on the Cliff by the Sea turned out to be a simple fairy tale of sorts. It pales in comparison to Miyazaki's previous great adventures, but the art is expectedly adorable so go see it if you're in need of some light entertainment. Oh, and the theme song is going to stick in your head.

People rants

There is a department at the office known as Graphics.

As its name suggests, Graphics is where people from other departments go to order graphics. The job can be as simple as downloading a picture off the Web, checking that it's good for use and making it accessible on the system. Or it can be as complicated as requiring illustrations and animation complete with bells, whistles and a nice shiny cherry on top.

Yesterday I walked into Graphics and asked if I could order a series of 4 pictures to be ready in 15 minutes.

It was a relatively simple order -- the pictures had to be downloaded off the Web and made accessible on the system. The only 'extra' in my order was for these to be pieced together so they could be accessible as a single file.

15 minutes? No, we can't make it, they said.

Meanwhile, 5 minutes slipped past before someone deigned to start on the order.

The guy looks at the order form. There was a particular section I didn't fill up involving the picture format. Which one do you want? he asked.

I couldn't answer, since none of the options stated was what I wanted. I was perfectly happy with the format the pictures came in. But no, I had to choose one. So I picked 'landscape'.

That turned out to be the wrong answer.

He stood up, went over to his female colleague and announced, She doesn't know what she wants.

This apparently is her cue.

How can you not know what you want? Didn't the people over there teach you? Do you want me to give you a course?

I want these pictures to be put together into one file.

Why do you want to do that? Are you going to edit the pictures?

No, I just want them to appear one after another.

Why don't you have them as single files then, that's easier. (Apparently it'll take an even longer time to put the pictures together into a single file.)

Right. I didn't know that. So I amended my order.

But she went on. And on. And on. I didn't respond to anything she said, firstly because I was strapped for time (as she very well knows), and secondly, the way she just sat there complaining (while someone else does the actual work) and repeating 'I don't think she understands' annoyed me.

Presently, I left the room.

Thirty minutes later, a senior co-worker came along and squeezed himself beside me.

I knew what it was going to be about.

I have just come from Graphics, he begun ...

I spent the next 5 minutes nodding. I didn't want to accidentally on purpose say anything rude. Mostly, I have no interest in engaging in petty office politics. I'm just there to work and get paid. (But it doesn't mean I can't rant.)